Pre-Dawn Thoughts

Cobie ready for his run
He scouts the area for possible targets

The sun has not yet shown his face.  With hands folded on my chest, I am lying here in the cool darkness of morning.  Thoughts run through my mind and I wonder what it is that I would be doing if I could do anything that I wanted.  I think about other people; the famous ones who have thousands of photo flashes illuminating their faces.  Are they happy?  What do they do when they are not on exhibit before the masses?  If camera flashes are a measure of one’s existence, then it appears to be a very hollow existence. 

But the question again returns: with what would I like to fill my life?  This is what I have been pondering of late and it seems that I have narrowed it down to two general categories.  One is in the area of play; the freedom to be able and to have the means and time to do whatever I want, when I want to do it.  But how do you define play?  I think I just did, at least for me: “freedom to be able and to have the means and time to do whatever I want, when I want to do it”. 

But wouldn’t this be likened to just killing time?  If there is no purpose connected to the act of playing, what good does it do?  Yes there must also be a purpose thrown into this mix. This brings me to the second general category of what I would like to fill my life with: helping others.  Helping others makes me feel useful.  It brings me pleasure when others around me are happy and smiling. 

There are many ways to help others.  You can help financially, physically lending a hand with some chore or even just a smile or an encouraging word.  Producing goods that people can purchase to save them time or to bring them enjoyment is also a way of helping.  As I see it, the problem for me is to find a way to play that also helps others in some way.  Whatever I endeavor to do must be financially sustainable.  I need to make enough money playing, so that I can help others.  This in turn, supplies the motivation and desire to play some more. 

For me, just sipping a pina colada on the beach under an umbrella doesn’t make it.  The journey on the way to the beach that tired me out in the first place is what makes the umbrella and the drink so satisfying.  Without the sweat of achievement, the reward is empty.  Like ying complements yang, so does effort complement reward.  

Now that I’ve pretty much laid out the objective, it’s time to devise a plan.  I must formulate a way to make play profitable.  But how can I do it?  Answering this question will take me to the next plateau in my journey.  

Presently there are two areas that I enjoy working in (ouch did I say work). Not including eating breakfast, one is writing and the other painting or drawing.  My immediate goal is to write and paint or draw every day until they become second nature to me; until they become as natural as, dare I say it, eating breakfast.  This goal might be realized or it may lead to new and different goals.  And this is all right.  It doesn’t matter how I get down the road to the beach.  With the proper amount of sweat and effort, that umbrella and pina colada will be mighty refreshing.  

Tell the Story

It is ironic that while a visual artist is in the business of producing images he or she is endeavoring to grasp something that is quite elusive: something that dwells in an invisible world.  The portrayal of emotions, ideas and desires is the necessary target; the painted image is merely the vehicle to express this invisible idea. 

Isn’t it interesting how autos are depicted in television commercials; radiantly happy individuals racing up winding picturesque mountain roads with the wind blowing through their hair.  You won’t see them stuck in traffic on a sweltering summer day or thumping down a road of pot-holes after the spring thaw. 

They’re not selling the car but rather they’re selling a romantic vision of you enjoying what the car might possibly be able to offer.  And people ultimately buy, not the car but the vision.

In a like manner, viewers are not captivated by the paint on a canvas.  They are captivated by what it represents to them.  The painting could be a financial investment, a status symbol or a good color match for the décor of a room.  It could be reminiscent of a familiar place or person.

This is perhaps why it has been so difficult for me as an artist to find subjects to paint, why I agonize over the composition or why I go for extended periods without painting anything.  I search for some subject that will resonate within me.  But, I now believe that this approach is flawed. 

Everything in this world has a story to tell, for all things are unique and beautiful in their own right.  It becomes my job to search out what that message is and to convey it to the best of my ability.  Hopefully, even with my limited ability I will be able to grasp a glimmer of its story. 

C.M. with drum and beater

You see, I am merely a storyteller and colored pigments are my words.  My ultimate goal therefore is to tell a story in a way that will move the viewer; it is in essence that I improve and become the best storyteller that I can be.

MC visited us again last week and graced us with stories and smiles.  He sported his kilt and played the drum.  By the way, MC is an artist himself.  He makes a nifty little aid which helps you judge values (the Value Viewer).  This is a link to his site.

Ah - The Good Old Summertime

Where does the time go?  Summer arrived and ushered in a slew of distractions.  Distractions are always present in one form or another but sometimes it seems that they team up for a concentrated assault. 

I have been suffering a dry spell as of late.  It is tough to stir up enthusiasm and dive into a project.   The blog goes without a post.  Production is near a standstill.  I envy those dedicated souls who can work through any obstacles and paint every day in spite of them. 

But I won’t give up.  Sooner or later I’ll pry distractions’ nasty fingers from my throat and find myself painting with passion once more. 

The other day I found myself in front of a live model; finally a break in the lull!  Is the worm turning?  Will things now be getting back to normal?  What a joy it was to be back at the easel.  The drawing flowed effortlessly.  It was one of those happy times when you watch in amassment as the drawings appear on their own right in front of you.

I suppose it is similar to how golfers relate to their sport.  They speak of the disheartening anguish they feel hitting 19 sub-par shots in a row.  Then, that 20^th shot rockets perfectly off the club head and lands in the middle of the fairway.  The euphoria they feel will carry them through the upcoming pitfalls until that next perfect shot. 

Oil on board  4" X 5"

Will drawing always be an emotional roller coaster for me like it is for the golfers or will practice eventually bring me to a point where I am virtually always in charge?  I have my doubts.  I think real life points toward the roller coaster scenario. 

A friend once wrote me “but for great sadness there can be no great joy.”  If we carry this idea to art we could say “but for great failures there can be no great success.”  Yes I’m sure that in one way or another, in the long term, it will be a great ride.  Tighten your seat belt and hang on; the coaster is rolling!

Live Model

Oil     8" X 10"

I so love working with a live model. Unfortunately, that has become a cause for problems because the opportunity to paint from a live model doesn't always exist as often as I like.  So when that happens, instead of shifting gears and painting a still-life or painting from photos, I sit and brood.

Today I have an opportunity to paint plein-aire with a group from my art association but the weather looks pretty bad.  Two days ago I also could have painted plein-aire but life got in the way.

I guess I'll really have to make an attempt to be more flexible.

This painting was one of two sisters posing in a studio last week.  They were playing chess at the time.  This is a good setup because even though they move, they still come back to the same positions often. I painted and drew several views of both the girls but liked this one the best.

Bubba

This is our dog Cobie.  He is a big Bubba.  After we first got him we thought we had made a terrible mistake.  While petting him he would let out this low growl as if preparing to rip you apart!  However we soon learned that this was the way he spoke and that he was a very gentle soul.

Going home with his new family

Things were not always pleasant for Cobie.  He lived in a no kill shelter for about a year.  He was sent there after being picked up off the street at about one to one and a half years old.  One shelter worker we met told us that as she would lock up for the evening Cobie would cry louder than any other dog so she would often take him home to spend the night with her and her children.

When we adopted Cobie we found that he was extremely aggressive toward other dogs.  We found scars on his back and realized that he had been attacked by other dogs in the shelter and was suffering emotional trauma.  He would fly into a frenzy even if he saw another dog walk by the house.  Well, after two professional dog trainers and many lessons later (and lots of family love poured upon him) he is a thousand times better.

His one hang-up though, is with the UPS trucks.  For some reason unknown to us he wants to tear them apart.  And, he can tell the difference between UPS trucks from other trucks.

Well, we have had Cobie now for about five years and he is an integral part of the family.  Although he will probably always have issues he will have them with a loving family around him.

Conte

Conte 24" X 18"

I tried working in Conte again the other day.  It was quite fun.  Been sticking with charcoal for so long that I forgot just how fun Conte is and how forgiving it can be if you start off with a light touch.  This drawing is on white paper although it looks rather gray.  

Oh oh.  Our Bubba dog is insisting I take him for a run.  He huffs and puffs and drools on me till I give in.  I tie him to the bike with a rope and run him while I ride.  THIS CAN BE VERY DANGEROUS!  He has augured me into the ground several times.  He has dragged Chris across a yard; perhaps the element of danger is appealing.  Anyway, I now have most of the bugs worked out and can complete most trips in relative safety. 

Cobie AKA Bubba

 This is Bubba.  DOWN BUBBA...DOWN!!

I'll show the bike hookup on a later post.

Every summer for one month on the weekends an event called the Renaissance festival is hosted not far from here.  I believe that most areas across the country have something similar.  A great many people get dressed up in medieval attire (or any form of costume for that matter) and reenact the days of old.  There is a King and Queen, jesters, jugglers, actors and almost everything else imaginable.  Chris and I try to go once a year to get reference photos and enjoy the festivities.

This is a place to get some really neat pictures.  All the participants are always in a good mood and seem to really enjoy having their pictures taken.  But, this can also be a source of difficulty.  You see when they see you with a camera pointed their way they pause and smile.  What would have been a beautiful candid shot now seems contrived.  When one is using a point and shoot camera as I do this will be a constant problem.  I need to upgrade to a better camera which would make use of a longer lens.  A longer lens would allow me to stand further away and zoom in discretely and get that more candid shot.  Ah well if wishes were horses beggars would ride.

Fur Hats  Oil 6" X 6"
Photo by Artist

I love the fur hats on these to girls.  They look like two Siberian beauties.  The weather was cold on this day and I'm sure the hats felt comfortable.  The other gal in the tricorn hat falls into a different era but why should I be judgmental.  I could have painted her out but maybe there is a nifty story in this just waiting to be told.  I'll look at this painting from time to time and it might trigger an imaginative idea.  Who knows?